I am so fortunate to have experienced a great teacher. I am more fortunate that he is still in my life. I do credit my teacher, Barry Green, PhD. with much of my success. Not many Massage Therapists get to say they have been in practice for 25 years. I have been vibrantly, busy and successful for 25 years and do not see any end to that at this point. Having the opportunity to see and be with Barry again was the height of my trip to San Diego. It was the anniversary of my beginning Massage School at Body Mind College.

On this anniversary I would like to pay homage to my teacher, Barry Green, PhD. by sharing the three most important things he taught me.

Willingness: Cheerful compliance, the quality or state of being willing, free choice or consent of the will, freedom from reluctance, readiness of the mind to do or forbear.

Being willing to work, set boundaries, learn, listen, connect, take the time, work on yourself, hear critique, work more to refine and being disciplined. Willingly accepting truths, exploring possibilities, letting go of ideas, things, concepts even people when it is sensible.

Whether you know me well or just a bit you understand that I am passionate about my work. Some say I am intense. I say I am in a constant state of  willingness.

Connecting: to join, link, or fasten together; unite or bind, to establish communication between, to cause to be associated, as in a personal or business relationship.

Not just making the time to be with a client but allowing yourself to be fully present with them, to connect with them. The sessions are much easier, more beneficial, and the information you gather is much more precise. The work is never mechanical but, always vibrant and never fatiguing.

It is almost painful for me to hear or see Massage Therapist cheering for the weekend, saying it is just a job, dreading Mondays, or thanking God their day is over. I have to wonder if they are really connecting.

Listening: The Chinese verb “to listen” is perhaps the simplest, yet most comprehensive, example of open-minded, active, complete listening known. The Chinese character that means “to listen” is made up of the characters that mean “eyes,” “ear,” “undivided attention,” and “heart.”

The Chinese view listening as a whole-body experience that involves all of these things.

  • The Ears – Listening with your ears means that you understand the listening process including focusing, understanding, and reacting. It means that you have moved past the hearing stage and made a voluntary decision to listen.
  • The Eyes – Listening with your eyes means that you look at the person who is talking. It means that you observe his or her facial expressions, movements, mannerisms, body language and nonverbal communication. It means that with your eyes you begin to see what that person is saying, even if he or she is not speaking.
  • Undivided Attention – This is perhaps the most difficult of actions. Your undivided attention means that you have eliminated all distractions and all barriers that may cloud your ability to listen. It means that you have moved beyond the prejudices and biases that you hold about a person, an issue, or a topic. It means that the person you are with is the only thing on your mind.
  • The Heart – It has been said that empathy is your pain in my heart. This is what listening with your heart entails, sympathy and empathy. It means that you are able to put yourself in other people’s shoes, inside their head, inside their life, and listen to them from their point of view. This does not mean you revel in it, say you totally understand it or embrace the drama of it.

I am looking forward to my next decade(s) of practice and I am thrilled my teacher still has many things to teach me.